Ever since last January when the dark days of winter enveloped New England in more ice and snow and clouds than I care to remember I struggled with the decision of what to do with myself, bike racing-wise.
"Do I want to race road bikes?" Hells yes, but it either meant lots of trainer time (not a chance) or a late start to the season. Coming from the NCNCA and lots of fabulous early spring racing that was a hard concept for me to grasp. Additionally, I was a little spoiled coming from the NCNCA. I wanted a Copperopolis, a Wente road race, not some silly circuit race. Ignorant to the ins and outs of racing in New England, I didn't know what I wanted to commit to, to peak for, and how to train for it. Plus, I didn't have a team - I didn't even know who the teams around here were (still don't, I guess). So that inevitably lead to the question,
"Do I want to race mountain bikes?" This seemed like a fun option, given my lack of team and my obsession with east coast mountain biking. The biggest detractor here was cost. I'd have to buy my UCI license (which I'll have to get before CX anyway, but that's beside the point) and the entry fees are more than most road events I've done. My bike, as much as I love it, also needed some help - I'm currently running a 3 year old chain and cassette, and really, really need new tires. Like, really. It adds up.
Of course, one thing was not in question - Cyclocross. I knew whatever else I did I wanted to race 'cross. We have something like 15 UCI races in New England this year, and it's about $200 bucks to fly to Wisconsin in January (brrrrrr!).
Tonight I'll go race my first criterium if 2011. It also happens to be my second road race of the year, 3rd bike race, and probably my 5th competitive event of 2011. Whoa. I did more racing in my 1st year of racing, when I wasn't even sure I was a racer.
So what do I want to do next year??? The same questions/excuses/problems present themselves in answer.
Instead of doing 5 hour rides and spending more than I can afford racing my bike this year, I did lots of fun rides in the woods, went snowboarding, learned to go off a 4 foot drop, went downhilling, read a lot, ran a lot, raced a 5k and a duathlon, hung out with friends and family, worked on my core and upper body strength, watched a World Cup MTB race, watched a slopestyle competition (wow, spectating!!! When's the last time that happened?), played capture the flag, didn't stress about standing on my feet for prologned periods, didn't stress out about what I was eating (I still eat super duper healthy, but don't worry so much about what goes in the day before a race), established myself as a personal trainer through a highly regarded organization, went swimming as much as I could and went sailing. Probably some other things, too. It was rad. I've had a great summer and spring (pretty much everything since the snow melted). I've had time to do the things I never get to do in the summers, and spend time with people who are important to me.
But . . . every time I log onto Cyclingnews, or NorCal Cycling News (yes, I still check out, somewhat obsessively, what's going on in the NCNCA), and any number of blogs I read on a regular basis, I get this pang of longing. It's the same way I feel when I think about the mountains to the west of Reno, or my friends and family who aren't on the east coast, or Cody when one of us is away for a few days. I miss road racing the way I'd miss a person, or a significant and dear geological feature (haha).
So I'm not making any promises or commitments. I'm not saying I'm going to race a full season of road. (I AM going to race a full season of cyclocross, which may or may not include nationals.) I'm not positive I'm ready to give up having another summer of frivolity. I just want to put this out there as a reminder to myself, come January, what it will feel like to spend another season off the road. Maybe the commitments will come then, or maybe sooner, but it's good to get it down, sort through the pros and cons and how I feel about it.
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